So......today we begin Week number 10 of our 20 Week journey with the Vocational Police Preparation Course (yes if you've ever thought about this as a career option, check out the link and see if this course is a fit for you!)
To pretend that this is anything other than massive amounts of HARD WORK, EFFORT, DETERMINATION and SINGLE-MINDEDNESS would be an outright lie!
To pretend that over the past week I haven't had thoughts of giving up and going back to the daily mundaneness of laundry, housework, cooking and television watching, would also be a lie. (Did I mention that all the aforementioned chores still have to be done on top of trying to achieve SUPER-HUMAN feats of physical and mental prowess?!?!)
So when the going does get tough..TOUGHER than this 38 year old exhausted body has any right to feel, do I just give up? Throw in the towel? Admitt defeat?
This is where my FAITH kicks in. This is where a power greater than my own has to take over. This is where I trust, that on the days when my BEST is far, far from the 120% I need to consistently hit, that God hears my prayers and knows the desires of my heart and the intent of my mind. He can make me better, faster, stronger, this I know for sure.
We all have weaknesses. Moments of self-doubt. Times where we question the journey and worse still, question ourselves. Today as I ran a 2.4km Mock Test, I had MASSIVE stitch, worse than I have EVER had since we started this journey. I was hunched forward in granny mode and I just could not find relief. Towards the end one of the girls from my course came to meet me and gently told me it was all good, that there was no need to push if it hurt that much. And yes, I was almost in tears. Thats when my WEAKNESS kicked in!
I am STUBBORN when it comes to reaching goals and pushing myself. There was no way I was stopping. As I ran those last 200 metres (supported by two awesome classmates by then, thanks Muffy & Dee) a scripture came to mind from the Prophet Ether in the mighty Book Of Mormon. He promised "If men come unto me I will show unto them weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and HAVE FAITH IN ME, then will I MAKE WEAK THINGS BECOME STRONG UNTO THEM"
I'm not giving up, I'm just beginning!